Attention: This Is NOT An April Fool...

(*Lights on, nobody home... Miss Universe, Dayana Mendoza)

Okay, this has to be the best "NON April Fool" story in the papers today.
In what's probably the best bit of poor taste since "Springtime for Hitler", and possibly the most eloquent comment on the utter worhtlessness of Miss Worlds, Universes and Galaxies everywhere, the current Miss Universe - one Dayana Mendoza - appears to have been a bit too enthusiastic in blogging about a visit to Guantanamo.
As a result the papers and the web are full of reports about her pronouncing the infamous US detention centre "relaxing, calm, and beautiful". Apparently it was "It was a loooot of fun!" - and "We also met the military dogs, and they did a very nice demonstration of their skills." (Their skills are probably usually more likely to focus on ripping the face off anybody in an orange jumpsuit, rather than delighting airheaded beauty queens, but still... lovely, eh...)

"I didn't want to leave," she coos, "it was such a relaxing place, so calm and beautiful." There's probably an easy gag somewhere about whether she thinks waterboarding is like surfing, but I can't be arsed to work on that... (There's probably also one about other people not having the option to leave... Again, can't be arsed. Sorry).
Sadly her entry is no longer online, her blog now featuring instead a rather awkward "statement by Paula M. Shugart, President of the Miss Universe Organization regarding Guantánamo Bay blog entry by Miss Universe, Dayana Mendoza".

This genuinely had me wondering for a while - and to be honest it's far funnier than some real April Fools in the media today, but there are some things that are just that teensy bit too twisted to be made up.
Can't wait for her holiday report from Gaza.